sweet trance

since 04.18.2004
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awesome guy status

breaking news 1:
izzy is about to hit
awesome guy status.
i know.
i know.
me neither.

entices my curiosity damn right.

breaking news 2:

definitely not a girly girl

i went to greenwich, rented a car, shopped like there's no tomorrow,
chill fest with Aaron.
I started kickboxing with him. I usually HATE HATE HATE exercise
but he motivated me to kick the shit out of him, so I did <3
Here is a picture of me being a hippy while holding a machete.
yes, that is how i roll.
hahaha. no. aaron is a weapon collector so he let me hold one of his prestigious weapons.
I even slept with it. well, on it, to be precise.

Came home around 2pm, tired and over-partied. I took a nice, steamy bath while listening to one of I's remixes.
Sorry to say, but he has not hit awesome guy status. it's just not happening.
I'm so physically attracted to him, but something is missing.
chemistry. it's not vibing as well as I liked it to. Hm.
My brother and I had a haircut party at his place in greenpt.
hair everywhere.
ice crackling in my rum+soda.
weed in a tupperware.
the stereo belted out weezer.
my brother is awesome.
After copious amounts of chilling, laughing and drinking
I've made my way to Bushwick to meet up with izzy.
I don't know why I hang out with him anymore (as of now)
because the butterflies are gone and I've yet to be enticed by his mind.
maybe it's time to drop him.
Oh, I even told him that I thought about dropping him. haaaaaaa.
I am such a little fool sometimes.

Went out for brunch. Had a huge salad and 2 mimosas.
how else am I going to celebrate another beautiful day off?
Drinking is the path to an alternative, delicate mind.
I've been sober for much of my life, might as well drink up while my immune system can handle it.
Sorry liver. You must be in poor shape.
I got home around 3pm, when Mom invited me out to dinner.
It's not really like her to ask me out unless it was for a certain occasion.
so I wondered.
"hmm, maybe she has an announcement to make?"
"or, she's trying to kick me out! oh no!"
"or, she's just lonely. aw, mom. lonely mom. we need to find you a man"
Apparently she just wanted to go out since she'll be ballin out some lovely tax returns later.
We went to Hasaki, an ambient japanese resto in the village.
Afterwards I came back home, took a nap while listening to weezer.
that shit gives me a headache when I'm attempting to go into a deep slumber.
No more weezer when sleeping. nope.
Woke up before midnight and made my way back to the village for a *girlies night out* with my uber co-workers.
I really love my co-workers <3<3<3<3
except for one that shall not be named.
or discussed about.
because I don't care at all anymore.
my co-workers were kind enough to listen to my boys situation.
am I digging myself into a dark hole?
I wouldn't say so, I'm just seeing what's out there and "being 23" as mari would say!


Going to London in 2 weeks, my god I am so poooooor :)

boy problems

there's the ex
and the other ex
and the co-worker who's madly in love with you,
and then there's izzy.

okay, that was easy.

friday night DJ improv

he looks so good when he's DJing
he looks so cute when he smiles
he always know how to touch and kiss me
i tell him he's gorgeous, but he doesn't think so.
he tells me that i'm gorgeous, but i don't think so.
i suppose we are just 2 modest ppl,
who loves to drink and lounge,
laugh and giggle,
living in the present
in unpredictable nyc.
i'd like to get to know you more, izzy darling. <3

Since my current main squeeze is living in Brooklyn,
i've been making my way there 2-3x a week these days.
Brooklyn is funnnnnnnnnn damn how come I was so anti-brooklyn for so long?
Such a mysterious place, with its hidden bars and venues
its chilled out atmosphere, although rowdy at times,
there's something about brooklyn that's pretty dope.

2012, you are indeed a mysterious one.

Also, my brother had told me that he rented a house in London for everybody to stay in
and that we're all chipping in. He could've told me a bit earlier as I was trying to figure out my sleeping situation.
gee wiz.


one time a dude bought me a stuffed ducky after i told him how much i loved ducks.
the game of the younger years...

cheerful beginnings

drifting in and out
in...then back out.
i was attempting to go into a deep slumber
when i heard an unfamiliar cat crying with a squeeky meow
a guy sarcastically says, "oh my god. shut up."
and then 5 seconds later he says " there you go :) <3 "
I'm still in the bed, warm and cozy however unfamiliar
my eyes slowly open and close. i yawn. i stretch.
oh yeah, i'm at izzy's place.
It was roughly 10am, and izzy left for work really early.
It was a strange feeling. Comforting, yet peligroso.
strangely enough, I've yet to let it be a retrospection.

so i've been on 3 dates with this dude within a week.
and just this morning he let me 'stay as long as i want.'
hm. is that a good thing? does he like me?
Oh bashful insecurities.
of course he fuckin does.
who wouldn't. :)
but anyway.
i'd like to get to know him more.
once he hits awesome guy status
official dating shall be commenced.

love. and then some.

love. and then some.
because lust is a particle of our well-being
like shooting stars flowing upwards
slowly spiraling in motions of unexpected swirls
you don't want it to stop
and then some.
i breath in my tobacco
and a few blissful memories pass through my mind.
exhaling a white cloud of passionate sighs,
i walk. and love.
and then some.